All Posts By

Dan Budnik

  • Reviews

    Shaitani Dracula (2006)

    Singh! You got the goods! You’ve left my mind spinning as my heart pines for the joys of scantily clad women wearing grotesque Halloween masks and vampire teeth. Nothing makes sense…

  • Reviews

    Beyond The Seventh Door (1987)

    In every movie, the lead character should have a cool name. On very rare occasions, the lead actor’s real name is cooler than the character’s name. Weng Weng is a better…

  • Reviews

    Death Shock (1981)

    All Hail, Walpurgis Night! The Witches’ Sabbath is nigh. Light the bonfires and celebrate! The day itself is named after Saint Walpurga. I’m not completely sure why, unless she is the…

  • Reviews

    Mark of the Beast (1986)

    My final year at West Irondequoit High School involved me spending a lot of time in a thin, grey video editing bay. For class, and sometimes for my own amusement, I…

  • Reviews

    Friday the 13th: Halloween Night (1994)

    If it’s Halloween and Jason and Michael Myers are stalking a group of teens AND the film is scored with Beastie Boys songs and Rob Zombie songs AND several of the…

  • Reviews

    Basement, The (1989)

    Four people arrive in a basement, confused and cheesed off. A being known as The Sentinel appears and tells them of their future sins in stories of varying length and gruesomeness.…

  • Reviews

    Double Agent ’73 (1975)

    God bless the day Doris Wishman met Chesty Morgan. Yeah! It’s the second Chesty and Doris number following Deadly Weapons! Chesty, who will do “whatever,” and Doris, whose mind is continually…

  • Reviews

    Stealthhunters (1991)

    I’ve never written a review in a Speedo before but there’s no time like the present. It’s blue, it’s tight, it says “MAMA RIDES” on the butt. I don’t know what…

  • Reviews

    Terrorists, The (19??)

    When you just let an imagination go, sometimes the most tremendous things can happen. This film, The Terrorists, is Pure Millard. Set in Munich and his home in Northern California (but…

  • Reviews

    Rescue Force (1989)

    “Work office. Burbank, CA 9:03 AM” Striker, Kiki, Bandana, Angel, the guy with the mustache, the other ladies and some other guys go up HARD against some terrorists operating around Syria,…

  • Reviews

    Savage Water (1979)

    Well, it finally arrived. I’d been wishing on a star for ages and the star came through for me. Turns out that I wasn’t ready for it. Dave Savage runs a…

  • Reviews

    Commando Game: Deadly Pursuit (1984)

    The ex-video store copy I have of this lists the category as “WAR”. That might not be completely true. This Video 2 Video extravaganza isn’t quite as good as the previous…

  • Reviews

    Bounty Hunters, The (1985)

    Video 2 Video strikes like the cobra. From the opening logo with wobbly synths to the final fade out that had me sitting there for 10 seconds before I said “Oh,…

  • Reviews

    Carnival Of Blood (1970)

    Nothing feels like those “First Half of the 70s” American Horror films. With no formula in place, they did whatever they thought would scare people. And, that involved actual scare tactics,…

  • Reviews

    Curse Of The Headless Horseman (1973)

    It’s really not about the horseman. This isn’t a Sleepy Hollow remake. Curse Of The Headless Horseman was made by Leonard Kirtman, who made Carnival Of Blood. If you haven’t seen…

  • Reviews

    Jimmy, The Boy Wonder (1966)

    Hoorah! Jimmy saved the world! Saved it from the evil Mr. Fig! And, it only involved a bit of walking around aimlessly through parks in Miami with a nice lady named…

  • Reviews

    Night Of Horror (1978)

    Four folks drive to a cabin deep in the mountains of Virginia for various family and recreational reasons. Their camper breaks down. While waiting in the dark, they encounter the ghosts…