A bounty hunter and a criminal throw down in a good old-fashioned fistfight. There are flying punches to the jaw and sharp knees to the gut. The men are caked in…
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A prison inmate has escaped and now he’s stealing a car and making a run for it. He goes where all escaped convicts go—the idyllic countryside, where one can find the…
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A lynch mob of grunting, out-of-shape dudes chase two ladies clad in strategically revealing clothing. One swings a chain. The other wields a gun with no bullets. One is definitely not…
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Sometimes, movies can be more than movies. In One Week, Buster Keaton massaged the real-life stressor of moving with sight gags involving a build-it-yourself house. Keaton’s humor works as advice. He…
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“Lesson number one: A Dragon must learn to endure pain.” “Go to hell.” “This is hell, Dragon. Welcome.” A Dragon, which is a fancy way of saying a guy in a…
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It’s easy to burn out on the world. No matter how old you are or what you’ve achieved in life, there will always be something to keep you up at night…
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It’s prom 1994, but it’s also a medieval costume party. It’s held in a gothic castle, complete with candelabras, suits of armor, vaulted ceilings, and a public bathroom with those metal…
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The world could use seven-hundred more Cynthia Rothrocks. Since that’s not possible, it’s our duty to canonize everything about the one that we do have. Cynthia Rothrock is the planet’s foremost…
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Somewhere in New York City, men and women in strategically ripped clothing thrash around to the sound of beating drums. A witch doctor dances and waves around a bundle of sticks…
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A ruthless killer has slashed a young lady and wrapped her bloody body in a sheet. He leaves behind a note: “One down 13 to go. -Mac” Now a promise has…
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“And for revenge, thou hast created this demon. Her domain is darkness, her purpose wickedness.” –Dead Sea Scrolls This is the only interesting part in the Dead Sea Scrolls; the rest…
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By 1952, The Three Stooges were on their decline. Their kick-off short for that year, A Missed Fortune, was yet another remake of an earlier hit. In this case, it was…
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The original poster for Women and Bloody Terror promises “terror that explodes in a wild nightmare,” one where “a love psycho goes berserk” and “women meet sudden brutal terror.” The only…
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I was in the marching band in high school. It’s true. I played both flute and piccolo because I wanted to double down on my nerd. I also played in the…
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“You have a beautiful body.” That’s the first line of dialogue in The Reincarnation Of Sex. Flattery will get this movie everywhere. Brazilian horror movies are defined by outrageous shocks and…
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Here is a list of tropes found in action movies: -a loose cannon of a womanizing cop who has a tortured past -a hot-headed police captain under pressure from the city…
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Dr. Abe Adams is a scientist who does science things like type on a typewriter and pour frothy liquids from one container into another. He is a serious scientist doing serious…
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It’s a known fact that ninjas from all over the world are capable of incredible feats. However, only ninjas from Turkey can throw a rock that turns into a bomb when…
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Dr. Richard Puller, DDS has problems. He’s tired. He’s busy. His waiting room is packed. With skanks. Everywhere he looks, there are skanks doing skank things like wearing skank outfits and…
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When I was nine, my family drove from Chicago to Florida, just like the Griswalds in National Lampoon’s Vacation. One morning, we stopped at IHOP for breakfast. I had to use…