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Reviews

  • Reviews

    Futuropolis (1984)

    Psychedelics are having a moment. Denver, Oakland, Ann Arbor, Seattle, and Detroit all decriminalized psilocybin. So if you go there, the cops won’t bother you while you smell sounds and hear…

  • Reviews

    G.B.H. (1983)

    Cliff Twemlow is many things. He is first and foremost a bouncer. He is also a stuntman. And a generous lover. And an actor, screenwriter, director, producer, composer, and novelist. He…

  • Reviews

    Gakidama (1985)

    In Japanese folklore, hitodama are the souls of dead people. They look like bright balls of fire that float around at night. Sometimes they make a thunderous sound. Other times they…

  • Reviews

    Galerians: Rion (2002)

    One night, I was really high. I floated down a YouTube rabbit hole, as one is wont to do when high. That’s when I discovered video game walkthroughs, which are recordings…

  • Reviews

    Ghosts of Hanley House (1968)

    In 1964, one-and-done filmmaker Louise Sherrill wrote, produced, and directed a crude, avant garde reinterpretation of The Haunting and called it Ghosts of Hanley House. No one cared. Until now. While…

  • Reviews

    Girl Grabbers, The (1968)

    I live in New York City, in a tenement building with 30 units. One person rented their studio via Airbnb and got evicted. My next-door neighbor is naked all the time.…

  • Reviews

    Girls Nite Out (1984)

    Originally published in Bleeding Skull! A 1980s Trash-Horror Odyssey. If this is college, I hereby revoke my degree. Somewhere between the sexual melancholy of The Last American Virgin and the juicy…

  • Reviews

    Go For Broke (1985)

    “We mustn’t quit now, or else we’ll be disgraced. . . . I’ll fight, even if I end up dead.” Cue the first-pumping guitar riffs and throttling basslines and get ready…

  • Reviews

    Goblin (1993)

    This is an updated version of a review that was originally published in Bleeding Skull! A 1990s Trash-Horror Odyssey. Lots of good things happen in Goblin. It has genital mutilation, someone…

  • Reviews

    Golden Girl (1974)

    When you sit down to watch a Turkish trash-action movie, you expect three things: 1. It will be in Turkish. 2. It will make no sense. 3. It will have a…

  • Reviews

    Gore Gore Girls, The (1972)

    At age twenty, The Kinks’ “I’m On An Island” was my defining mid-60s jam. The song bookended a 90 minute “KOOL KINKS” Maxell mixtape that I made, and I even recorded…

  • Reviews

    Grapes Of Death, The (1978)

    In Laurel & Hardy’s Our Relations, Oliver Hardy says, “You can trust me insipidly.” It’s one of their most enduring puns and there’s a good reason why. Ten minutes into The…

  • Reviews

    Graveyard Of Horror (1971)

    After watching this movie for 86 minutes, I have no answers. But I’m not alone — the synopsis on the back of the DVD case couldn’t even get the facts straight.…

  • Reviews

    Great Hollywood Rape Slaughter, The (1974)

    Well, it’s not that great. The Great Hollywood Rape Slaughter opens with a movie-within-a-movie that resembles the movie-within-a-movie from A Clockwork Orange — the one that “reforms” Alex by forcing him…

  • Reviews

    Gruesome Twosome, The (1968)

    Herschell Gordon Lewis was the first filmmaker on earth to show audiences what happens when a tongue is ripped out of a face. So he’s basically a great humanitarian. From Boin-n-g…

  • Reviews

    Gunblast (19??)

    Joy comes in many, many forms. For instance: “Hey man you fucked my woman last night I’m going to kill you.” Such a phenomenal “sentence”. You don’t even need the context…

  • Reviews

    Hack-O-Lantern (1988)

    Originally published in Bleeding Skull! A 1980s Trash-Horror Odyssey. Tommy loses himself in the magic of a Walkman. He closes his eyes and whispers, “I can’t hear nuthin’ anymore.” A video-length…

  • Reviews

    Hackers, The (1988)

    Originally published in Bleeding Skull! A 1980s Trash-Horror Odyssey. While perusing the Yellow Pages for roof repairs, the name “A.J. Hacker & Sons” might stand out. Or, it might not. Prepare…

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