In elementary school, kids called me Annie Choi-Boy or Annie Fannie. They also called me Ching Chong, which is definitely not racist because I speak fluent Ching Chong. I think we…
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Annie Choi
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I am a cat person, but I do not have a cat. I just find cats refreshing. They’re total assholes that don’t care about your feelings, and they aim to please…
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Clearly 2020 will be a year we remember and one we rather forget. We hope from the bottom of our black little hearts that you remained healthy and sane (but not…
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A few days ago I woke up with a hankering for a Bloody Mary. This is not something I usually drink, but for whatever reason, it sounded absolutely perfect. Salty, spicy,…
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Let’s talk horror. We of course know the classic horror stories—the ones with Freddy, Jason, Michael, Leatherface, and a whole bunch of forgettably attractive white people. These fictional, goopy, squishy barnstormers…
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It’s Halloween and people are dressed up as Frankenstein monsters, vampires, werewolves, and gloriously deformed creatures, including a monster with another monster in its neck. It’s the best night of the…
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Listen, there’s a lot of stuff America is good at: freedom of the press, Yosemite National Park, Golden Retrievers, ranch dressing, type 2 diabetes. And there’s a whole lot of stuff…
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Warhawk Tanzania is a man who takes no shit and fucks shit up. He gives no shit, but at the same time, he gives a shit, especially when it comes to…
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Remember when the Beatles came to America? They stepped off the plane and girls were waiting on the runway, absolutely losing their fucking minds. Screaming, screeching, yelling, pulling their hair, waving…
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“We mustn’t quit now, or else we’ll be disgraced. . . . I’ll fight, even if I end up dead.” Cue the first-pumping guitar riffs and throttling basslines and get ready…
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Love it or hate it, New York City is a character. This city can be gruff or warm, silly or serious, hopeful or dangerous. It will smell like hot garbage and…
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The story goes like this: William Lee made Treasure of the Ninja in 1987 while he was a student at Ohio State University. It was a labor of love; he wrote,…
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Superstar: The Karen Carpenter Story is a film that could’ve only been made by a highly intelligent professional pot-smoker. No, no, not me, please. It’s Todd Haynes. This man, of course,…
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Let’s talk desserts. Pie, cheesecake, cookies, brownies, that ice cream cake you bake in the oven but somehow doesn’t melt. I don’t know what sorcery that is, but I know I…
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Did you know that there’s a parasitic fungus that turns ants into zombie slaves? It takes over an ant’s brain and causes it to climb up a plant where it clamps…
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Perhaps more than any other movie in the 80s, Fatal Attraction showed the world that bitches be crazy. Not to be undone, director Orhan Elmas wanted to show the world that…
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If you’re like me—and you are—then you love gooey, goopy, gruesome horror movies, ones that explode with crimson gore or neon slime. You love those beasties coated in mucus, with the…
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At some point in filmmaking history, people—ahem, men—decided that all women in the thoes of a mental breakdown do the following: eat their feelings with reckless abandon modern dance (pronounced dahnse)…
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Somewhere in sun-baked Nigeria, a cabbie picks up a passenger alongside an empty dirt road. Watch out, it’s a zombie! And it’s wearing a giant floppy straw hat! Zombies need sun…
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Isaac Hayes. Eddie Deezen. Juliette Lewis. Elisabeth Moss. Forest Whitaker. John Travolta. Tom Cruise. Scientology has claimed the minds of many, though if I’m being honest, I’m probably most bummed about…