All Hail, Walpurgis Night! The Witches’ Sabbath is nigh. Light the bonfires and celebrate! The day itself is named after Saint Walpurga. I’m not completely sure why, unless she is the only witch saint in the Catholic Church. That would be cool but I don’t believe it’s true. Regardless of the lineage, it’s time for the worshippers of the night to step forward. Summoning forth their Master from the Netherworld.
But, first, Death Shock? Can I see your sweet booty? Just a quick look. Come on, why not? I’m a nice guy. Clean and Catholic. OK, I won’t push.
Sigh.
Death Shock is a SOV, British adventure filled with T&A and a whole lot of rutting around. Its plot reminds me a bit of Invitation to Hell but with no Hulk masks and a lot of what the kids call “beaver.” Three couples, one lesbian, two straight-ish, are on vacation, screwing around the beautiful English countryside. They run out of gas. They end up at a house owned by a group of demon worshippers awaiting the arrival of a virgin. The homeowners employ a hunchback male servant and a woman with large breasts. And, the screwing around continues. Some of it is quite graphic. Some is about as convincing as the grinding found in any Harry Novak film from the 70s. The supernatural element takes up about 10 minutes of this film’s 47 minute running time. The director, Mr. Honey, seems to have forgotten that this isn’t supposed to be a straight up screwing film. At least, the advertising leads me to believe that. But, who can argue with Satan worshipping when it’s marinated in wieners and beavers? Not I, friend. No arguing here. A small nap, maybe, but no cross words.
Death Shock has a bunch of attractive people, some with mustaches or named Murray, having sex a lot. If you’re in the mood for that, this will continue your mood. If you’re looking for the horror implied by the title and the cover, the filmmakers would suggest that you return your attention to the intercourse. There is an opening scene where a young woman stumbles upon a nude Satan ceremony involving Buddhist chanting. Night on Bald Mountain plays loud as she is chased by naked men through the woods. When she is placed on the sacrificial stone, they rip all her clothes off. All I could think was “Be careful with those panties! She’s got a lot of hair down there. Don’t pull any of it.” They seemed to take my plea to heart. No pubic hair was harmed in the making of this film!
The gal with the big boobies asks a glorious mustache of a man if he likes her boobies and her legs. From his face, I can’t tell his thoughts. He could be admiring her chest. He could be contemplating the crepuscular waxing of his mustache. Tough to gauge. I do know that one member of the lesbian couple does not appreciate the addition of a dildo to her sexual escapades. She gets in an argument with her girlfriend over said sexual aid and ends up alone, wandering the home. Unfortunately, her refusal to take part in Dildo Heaven means she is a virgin. As the film draws to a close, her fate is decided on the sacrificial stone.
Hey, it’s almost porn. I know that. But, I am easily fooled so I kept expecting a bit more horror, a bit less XXX. There is some death and shock related behavior. But, not that much. However, during a traveling scene and a dinner scene, the movie overlaps constant, casual conversations between the main characters. At those moments, I was reminded of several slasher films from the time period, like The Prey or The Final Terror. I like those moments. I also liked a moment when, after a bit of an orgy, we see a nude man sipping a beer while his nude companions sleep next to him. Very casual and nonchalant. Big Boobs leans in and motions him out of the room. The nude guy shrugs and follows her. Can you go to too many orgies? The question remains unanswered.
Walpurgis Night can be spent summoning demons. It can also be spent oiling a pair of large boobs belonging to a nude woman chained up in your house. Death Shock dares to wonder what would happen if you combine the two in the same scene. Only watching this film will reveal the results.
