All Posts By

Joseph A. Ziemba

  • Features

    Exquisites 2005: Films Of The Year

    William Castle kicks off his biography, Step Right Up! I’m Going To Scare The Pants Off America!, with an age old question. What attracts people to horror films? Why do they…

  • Reviews

    Backwoods (1987)

    Indiana is the quintessential Midwestern industrial wasteland — oil refineries, steel mills, and shitloads of corn. You’d never know it, but there’s more than gross smells, Splashin’ Safari, and corn in…

  • Reviews

    Revenge Of Dr. X, The (1970)

    From the concrete of Cape Canaveral to the beaches of Japan, the brilliant Dr. X has his stuff together. He knows what he wants and he gets what he wants. Alas,…

  • Reviews

    Schizo (1976)

    In line at the grocery store, I hoped that Samantha was going to be OK. Driving home, I hoped nothing terrible happened to Alan. Making breakfast the next morning, I tried…

  • Reviews

    Death Bed: The Bed That Eats (1977)

    Who needs Freddy Krueger when we have Death Bed: The Bed That Eats? Deep within a forest, a cobblestone embankment houses an underground cave. Inside the cave lies Death Bed: The…

  • Reviews

    Frightmare (1974)

    In 1962, The Crystals sang, “He’s a rebel and he’ll never ever be understood.” The Phil Spector production was a runaway #1 hit in the U.S., but peaked at #19 on…

  • Reviews

    Blood Orgy Of The She-Devils (1973)

    Spiritual lightning has struck again. Walking home from work, I was seized by psychic thunderclaps, revealing themselves as screeching female voices: “Find the Dance Costumes By Eros! Find the Special Electronic…

  • Reviews

    Killing Of Satan, The (1983)

    Jean jacket. Chuck Taylor hi-tops. Fluffy mustache. The power of God. Lando San Miguel is here to save us. Ah, the Phillipines. It’s nice to be back. Just when the memories…

  • Reviews

    Possessed, The (1976)

    This morning, my Lucky Charms were sweet as can be. The work day treated me just fine. But then, while riding the train, I nodded off on the way home. Visions…

  • Reviews

    Vampira: About Sex, Death, and Taxes (1995)

    Reminiscing about her 1950s escapades in Hollywood, Maila Nurmi (aka Vampira) turns to the camera and says, “Of course, I thought I was from another planet.” That’s why we love her.…

  • Reviews

    Playgirls and the Vampire, The (1962)

    The Transylvania Chamber of Commerce just opened their second bottle of French cognac tonight. They’re celebrating because they’ve figured out a surefire way to drum up some cash-flow during the tourist…

  • Reviews

    Screams Of A Winter Night (1979)

    The moldy scent of pointlessness has shuffled into the living room. I’ll do what I can to help. Screams of a Winter Night is a PG-rated, low-budget anthology horror film from…

  • Reviews

    Thrill Killers, The (1964)

    Spending a few minutes with The Thrill Killers is like leafing through a vintage copy of Monster World in your parents’ attic, watching an old VHS of The Beatles on Ed…

  • Reviews

    Swamp Of The Lost Monster (1957-65)

    It’s funny how the passage of time can affect a film. Take this one, for instance. Ridiculous? An absolute bore? To stuffy minds of earlier decades, perhaps those descriptions are apt.…

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