It’s a dark and stormy night. It’s a night just like tonight—that is, if it’s dark and stormy where you are. Two lovers hunker down in a dark, abandoned house. It’s…
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If I had to choose a dystopian wasteland to call home, the one in Terror of the Disgusting Space Worms From Outer Space would definitely be a top-fiver. Mary and Larry…
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“Abstract Plain” is a song from the album Teenager of the Year by Frank Black. The lyrics describe Black’s desire to escape from the real world to an emotional oasis: “I…
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A few days ago I woke up with a hankering for a Bloody Mary. This is not something I usually drink, but for whatever reason, it sounded absolutely perfect. Salty, spicy,…
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Listen, there’s a lot of stuff America is good at: freedom of the press, Yosemite National Park, Golden Retrievers, ranch dressing, type 2 diabetes. And there’s a whole lot of stuff…
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Superstar: The Karen Carpenter Story is a film that could’ve only been made by a highly intelligent professional pot-smoker. No, no, not me, please. It’s Todd Haynes. This man, of course,…
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Let’s talk desserts. Pie, cheesecake, cookies, brownies, that ice cream cake you bake in the oven but somehow doesn’t melt. I don’t know what sorcery that is, but I know I…
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Perhaps more than any other movie in the 80s, Fatal Attraction showed the world that bitches be crazy. Not to be undone, director Orhan Elmas wanted to show the world that…
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If you’re like me—and you are—then you love gooey, goopy, gruesome horror movies, ones that explode with crimson gore or neon slime. You love those beasties coated in mucus, with the…
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After watching Fuck the Devil, I was convinced that the best 40 minutes of my life were over and it was all downhill from there. Then Nightmare Feddy showed up during…
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Somewhere in sun-baked Nigeria, a cabbie picks up a passenger alongside an empty dirt road. Watch out, it’s a zombie! And it’s wearing a giant floppy straw hat! Zombies need sun…
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You can ask Alexa pretty much anything: the weather in Chicago (cold), the speed of light (fast), the age of the oldest person in the world (122). You can ask her…
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When a movie called Fuck the Devil opens with a scene of a baby crawling across a floor, it’s safe to assume that something bad will happen to that baby. Enter…
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Dracula gazes sexily into the camera and into your eyes. His gleaming white fangs catch the light just right. He’s got a full head of luxurious black hair, perfectly conditioned and…
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In Where Evil Dwells, every night is Halloween. On June 19, 1984, Long Island teenager Ricky Kasso went to the woods, smoked PCP, ate acid, and stabbed his friend Gary Lauwers…
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Cliff Twemlow is many things. He is first and foremost a bouncer. He is also a stuntman. And a generous lover. And an actor, screenwriter, director, producer, composer, and novelist. He…
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Originally published in Bleeding Skull! A 1980s Trash-Horror Odyssey. Did Jason Vorhees ever drive a speedboat? Srigala is an Indonesian rip-off of Friday the 13th. But instead of a killer exacting…
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I like change. I like it when I’m challenged to grow and adapt to whatever path life takes. Change helps us to focus and make things better. We learn from it.…
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I’ve never understood Led Zeppelin. Their songs are all one-riff bro-jams that last three minutes longer than they need to. But I just saw Turkish Batman and Robin wipe out a…
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It’s easy to burn out on the world. No matter how old you are or what you’ve achieved in life, there will always be something to keep you up at night…
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The original poster for Women and Bloody Terror promises “terror that explodes in a wild nightmare,” one where “a love psycho goes berserk” and “women meet sudden brutal terror.” The only…
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It’s a known fact that ninjas from all over the world are capable of incredible feats. However, only ninjas from Turkey can throw a rock that turns into a bomb when…
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What happens when a group of “professional killers” pulverize a couple with a bulldozer and leave their ten-year-old son for dead? Hint: It involves revenge. Another hint: It involves turning a…
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Some movies have training montages of shirtless men using exercise machines. But only one movie has a training montage of shirtless men using each other as exercise machines. DEATH RUN! Nuclear…
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Sixty minutes into Wendigo, two men paddle down a river in a canoe. This is not surprising. Because up until this point, most of the movie is made up of people…
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The hoi polloi mingle at a black tie birthday party for a teenager. Think of it as a really fancy bat mitzvah, only Japanese. A singer belts out “Happy Birthday Dear…
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A bloody hand reaches out from a lake and drowns a lady in a rowboat. Meanwhile, a blind girl plays with a headless doll and a dead chicken hangs from a…
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All aboard the Terror Express! Making stops at Smutville, Whoresburg, and Rapey-Rape-Town. Dining car is in the rear. Please move about the aisles carefully; the entire train is dripping in sleaze.…
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I know nothing about the facts surrounding Charles Manson and his crimes. But I do know that The Manson Massacre has a scene where a baby gets thrown into a dumpster.…
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Witchcraft ’70 achieves the impossible — it makes Satan boring. This faux-mondo documentary is all about repetition. Narrator Alberto Bevilaqua (aka Edmund Purdom from Pieces) explains that hidden cameras have captured…
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I went for a walk. The Shangri-Las were on my headphones. The roads were quiet and the sky was overcast. The only things that existed were Mary Weiss’s dual-tracked vocals, reverb…
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Reminiscing about her 1950s escapades in Hollywood, Maila Nurmi (aka Vampira) turns to the camera and says, “Of course, I thought I was from another planet.” That’s why we love her.…