THE HOUSE THAT CRIED MURDER
(1973)
aka THE BRIDE
(part of BLOOD BATH 2: 4 MOVIE PACK)
Directed by Jean-Marie Pélissié
Brentwood/BCI DVD
THE FILM
Behold the house that Barbara built.
Perhaps, the services of a licensed
contractor would've helped.
If you want something done right,
do it yourself. Isn't that always
the case? Barbara thought so. She
huffs. She puffs. She gets her way.
Unfortunately, all of that brash
exertion spells trouble for a pressboard
foundation. A somber rarity from
the team of writer-director Jean-Marie
Pélissié (never directed
another film) and writer-producer
John Grissmer (Blood
Rage!), The House That
Cried Murder (here titled The
Bride) takes pride in DIY ethics.
The film swaps 70s trade secrets
with Let's
Scare Jessica To Death;
it's entirely unique, filled with
surprises, and relies on mysterious
affairs. Then, we visit a street
fair for ten minutes while perpetual
"ba-ba-bas" cheese the
soundtrack. Is that a crack above
the staircase?
Barbara (soap star Robin Strasser)
is a rich, unbalanced brat with
an endless supply of funds from
Daddy. Babs sez, "Daddy,
I want to build my own house!"
She gets it. Babs sez, "Daddy,
I want to marry David, from your
Firm!" Daddy sez, "There's
something about David...HE STINKS!"
Does he ever. At the wedding reception,
David gets down to business with
an ex-flame named Ellen. Barbara
walks in. Scissors. Blood. The Don
Murray Orchestra is interrupted.
Barbara freaks out and drives off.
As for David and Ellen? Revenge
will not be sweet. Nor will the
fried chicken.
Gradually immersive photography.
Moments of genuine madness. A climax
which defines odd, low budget perfection.
The House That Cried Murder
is built with determined dignity,
but lacks concrete stability. A
series of ill-timed bummers oozes
between the good stuff. Inopportune
padding at the fair, the lake, and
the house slag the film's tempo
and misalign the delirious rhythm.
Bouts of laughable emotion (Ellen,
you blew it!) taint an otherwise
ideal group of performances. The
sudden violence and nice scares
are well presented, but play it
too safe. Still, settling isn't
always a bad thing. Just a little
inconvenient.
The house that Barbara built doesn't
fall down completely...it just sways
a little.
AUDIO AND VIDEO
Plaster falls. Obviously sourced
from a video master, House
doesn't look so hot. Fuzzy, scratchy,
overly dark, and riddled with vid-blips
and jump cuts, this full frame print
is no June bride. That said, the
film has never seen a legit home
video release in North America,
so I'll take what I can get.
EXTRAS
The 4-film strong "Blood Bath
2" is Brentwood's most enjoyable
budget pack to date. Two flipper
discs hold this treasure trove of
ultra-obscurities, all of which
were licensed from 1970s distributor
Bryanston. Aside from The House
That Cried Murder, there's
Jack The Ripper Goes West
(exhausting western-horror botch),
Legacy Of Satan (incredibly
cheap, de-humpified trash excellence
from Gerard "Deep Throat"
Damiano), and Blood Song
aka Dream
Slayer (Frankie Avalon
slasher that looks a million times
better than my ruddy HQV VHS). More
Bryanston rarities, please.
FINAL THOUGHTS
A true fixer-upper. The House
That Cried Murder has its share
of tough splits, but you're pretty
handy, right? I thought so. The
film deserves a look from lovers
of 1970s obscurities, despite a
few setbacks. If the "Blood
Bath 2" set isn't on your shelf
yet, I give up. Now go dig out the
Prism Blood Rage tape and
watch it again.
— Joseph A. Ziemba, 04.05.07 |
Barbara Van Poutsalot
Uh-oh
Wedding of the year
Somber clucks
|
